Jealousy is a waste of our time and energy. However, if we experience jealous feelings, it may be helpful to consider the cause.

The notion of jealousy is captured in the old famous saying: “the grass is always greener on the other side.” This is when we believe someone else has it better than we have. This is an easy way to think and reflects a bit of human nature. But, really, in everyday situations (excluding severe poverty, hardship or violence), how can we judge “the other side” as being better without having experienced “the other side?” The truth is, we can’t. By simply realizing this, we can understand the folly of thinking that what we don’t have is guaranteed to be better than what we do have.

A feeling of jealousy can also be a sign that we have a lack of gratitude for what we have in our life. When we take stock of all the good we have in our lives – when we count our blessings – our appreciation builds and our jealousy dissipates.

Here are five ways that demonstrate that being jealous doesn’t serve us well:

1. Universally, jealousy is regarded as a horrible trait to have and rightly so. Jealous people certainly aren’t fun to be around. Who wants to hear someone say that they covet what someone else has? It’s not pleasant to hear.

   Expressing jealousy to someone for what they have or what they do is likely to make that person feel uncomfortable and not want to address what we said.

   If we want to improve our likability factor and sociability, jealousy is a good trait to eliminate from our repertoire.

2. Being jealous of, or coveting, someone else’s happiness doesn’t help us gain the source of the other person’s happiness. Right? So, why even bother being jealous?

   Besides, sometimes someone’s expression of happiness can, sadly, be based on an illusion. What may appear as genuine happiness to us may be an outward cover masking pain or unhappiness.
   
   Even if the other person is truly happy in a given moment, it does not mean that the other person is always happy. So why spend a moment being jealous?

   No one is always happy every minute of every day. While one can be and describe themselves as happy, there would surely be things in that person’s life that are challenging, disappointing or sad. Such is the nature of life for all humans.

   Rather than being jealous of someone else’s happiness, we can choose to be happy for them. It’s kinder… and smarter. We know that our time will come when we have our own happiness to celebrate during our moments of joy or feelings of gratitude.

3. Jealousy is based on a feeling of lack in our lives. If we dwell on being jealous, this perpetuates in us the miserable feeling of being in a state of lack. The law of attraction may be something that could be useful in this instance.

   This law is the simple concept that like attracts like. Many have found this idea helpful in improving their mindset and what they experience in life. It is the focusing of one’s thoughts on positive outcomes as if these outcomes were already a reality. Meaning – one is not thinking of what they lack and, therefore, desire, but rather their thought energies are already expressing gratitude for the abundance in their life as if it were so.

   Our thoughts are powerful. This is the core of what the law of attraction is all about. I have found the law of attraction to be helpful, and even pleasantly astonishing, in my life.

   Each person would have their own view of whether the law of attraction makes sense for them, as the law of attraction has its critics.

   Nevertheless, our thoughts help to form our opinions and our outlook and, ultimately, many of our experiences. If our experiences do not include us having feelings of lack – however we get to these experiences – we would have no use for or desire of being jealous.

4. Being critical of someone else is often borne of jealousy. Having the need to make a critical remark about someone, whether being face-to-face with them, behind their back or commenting publicly online, has to be because there is something the utterer feels to be lacking about themselves. Why else?

   The compulsion to be hateful reveals the commenter’s lack of self esteem; they feel the need to cut someone else down to try (unsuccessfully) to build themselves up. Even if the one making the critical statement is just plain mean and a bully, it is also quite obvious that the cruel person has a low opinion of themselves and lashes out against another to deflect from their own perceived deficiencies.

   Those that have a good sense of their own worth do not feel the need to belittle another person – there’s nothing in it for them. If one feels good about themselves, they’re too busy enjoying their life to think about, let alone act on, being mean to someone else. They are not jealous of others because they understand that there is an unlimited amount of good fortune to go around. In fact, they take pleasure in seeing the success and happiness of others.

   If one tends to criticize others, their jealousy and lack of self respect is showing.

5. The act of feeling jealous doesn’t make us feel good. It only hurts us. If we think back to a time when we may have been jealous, we will remember that it was not a good feeling.

   We can simply choose not to be jealous because it is always a choice.

Being jealous really doesn’t get us anywhere in life and can even hold us back from being fulfilled and happy. So, if we have been experiencing some jealous feelings of late, we can reflect on what is really at the heart of these feelings. We can adopt new ways of thinking about things when the urge to feel jealous arises, as jealousy hurts us more than it helps us.

Remember that You are the Light of your own Life. And you can joyfully kick jealousy to the curb once and for all.