As women, we have a special appreciation for our female friends. There is nothing like them. Whether we have had these friends since childhood, high school, college, or even some time in our adulthood, we have shared experiences and have a shared history. Our girlfriends have been there before, during and after the romantic partner relationships we’ve had in our lives. They know us and we know them. We confide in each other. It’s a special bond often akin to sisterhood. The family we choose. Really, where would we be without our girlfriends?

Yet, it is common to lose touch with friends that were once a constant presence in our lives, and this is simply the natural progression of life. We can sometimes feel a little bit guilty about this, but, at the same time, we know that if we feel the need to reconnect with a particular friend, we will. So, perhaps it’s time for us to let go of this type of guilt and simply focus on the friendships we actively wish to nurture at this juncture of our lives.

As we get older and busier, either in our work lives or just in general, we may find it difficult to maintain and properly nurture our close friendships. Perhaps we set up lunch (or breakfast or dinner) get-togethers with a girlfriend to keep in touch and get caught up on what’s going on in each other’s life. I do this often.

Sometimes we slot in these restaurant meetups when we have other commitments gnawing at us for right afterwards – when we just try to ensure we get that friend meeting into our schedule – and, afterwards, we may feel that perhaps the time spent together was not actually quality time. Maybe this rushed type of get-together didn’t really fulfill our need for close friendship time and was more like any other scheduled appointment. Like it came and went. This is especially true if the meal outing was brief, interrupted by a busy restaurant environment or if our mobile phones are placed beside us on the table at the ready (other than for taking pictures of us and our friend – which is nice to do 😊– or for emergency purposes).

I get together regularly with one of my close girlfriends. We go to see a play or movie or a live skating show and grab a bite to eat beforehand or afterwards. These are fun outings, and at least we get the opportunity to connect and get caught up even if we don’t have much time to really have a heart-to-heart conversation.

When we feel the need to nurture our friendship bond and really share in how our friend is feeling and what her thoughts and concerns are about what’s happening in her life, I believe there is nothing better than having a sit-down conversation (in person if possible, or on the phone or a video call if necessary) where distractions are removed and time restrictions are not in play, and the focus can be on each other. We may not realize how the noise of our surroundings can impact the quality of our social interactions, especially those precious conversations with our girlfriends.

I used to regularly visit friends at their residence, or they would visit me at mine, just to have a conversation. It could be in the afternoon or in the evening, over a cup of tea, a tumbler of iced tea or a glass of wine. These simple get-togethers were always meaningful, and time very well spent. I had gotten away from these simple, yet soul-nourishing, get-togethers with my dear friends in the last number of years; just simply forgetting to engage in this type of get-together.

So, recently, I invited three of my closest girlfriends, each for a one-on-one get-together at my home, for a nice, uninterrupted conversation. Because we were in a setting that was cozy, welcoming, and free from distractions, these conversations were able to get to a deep level and emotions could be freely shared without embarrassment. Some tears were shed by me and my respective friends, mostly from a bit of sad reflection. We are of an age when we have lost our parents in recent years and one of my girlfriends had recently lost her sister. We could share in each other’s grief and comfort each other. The shedding of tears was a relief. It was lovely to console each other. We could be fully present. Mindful. In the moment. It was very real and cathartic.

Each of these conversations deepened my friendship with these girlfriends. I am so happy I made the time and space for these quality get-togethers with three of the most beautiful souls I’ve ever known.

How wonderful are the moments in our life when we take the time to spend quality time with a much-loved friend and give each other our undivided, non-rushed attention. After all, don’t you and your friends deserve this loving attention?

You can create these precious moments for yourself and reap the rewards of enhancing the bonds of the female friendships you have in your life.

You are loved. You are thought of. You are needed. You are the Light of your own Life.